Sunday, January 31, 2016

Where Are The Strippers, NYC?

     So… I’m sitting here, looking at this blank page and wondering… “Hmm, now what?”
     I’d thought about doing a little something that was history related, but… meh, sounds kinda boring now. Then I considered just winging it, as I so often do, and just ramble along about whatever comes to mind, but then… I’m really not in the mood to ramble. Besides, I don’t have all that much to ramble on about.
     So what now? Oh hell… I need more coffee.

     Oh, I know…
     Rainbow Book Fair in New York City. Yeah, that’s the ticket. Uhh… well, maybe? Right… Let’s see how this goes.
     I finally booked the apartment where I’ll be staying. Check, done. Looking at plane tickets, waiting a bit longer. Still too soon to book those. I try and book no sooner than six weeks out, but that may change. I’ll keep an eye on it.
     Inventory books. Check. Damn, I’m going to need to order more books.
     Swag. Ugh, I hate having to deal with swag. I never know what to do, and that shit gets expensive.
     Stripper party. SCREECH! Brakes on.
     What is it with New York City that you have NO strip clubs? What gives? Many of you know that I try and have a little party with my fellow authors at a strip club. It’s fun!

     I thought I had something all lined up and them BAM! The manager decided to be a real jerk, so I backed off. So I start my search again. Found several places with go-go boys, but no strippers, and yes, there is a difference. I mean, go-go boys are fine, but there is no show there. Just guys shaking their asses in underwear. I have a feeling that the art of a good strip show is dying out.
     Come on NYC, get it together! I’m excited to be going to New York. It is more about seeing old friends than anything else. I forgot who said it, but it isn’t the city or seeing the sights that makes a city special, it’s the people who make it. I so agree with that.
     Of course, being the total foodie that I am, I’m looking forward to having some really good meals. I know that there are going to be those who think I’m crazy to plan my trip around meal times, but hey, it was such a big part of my life for so long, how can I not. Carnegie Deli damn well have their kitchen fixed this time. I’ll be banging on the door if not and demanding my Reuben!

     Now years ago, and no I’m not going to say how long ago, I remember when Times Square was one of the sleaziest places I’d ever seen. Granted, it needed to be cleaned up, but come on… there’s got to be a little balance for us good natured, fun loving pervs. Don’t we deserve a little adult fun when in the Big Apple? So frustrated.

     Meanwhile, on the writing front…
Yes, there is a reason for this photo.
     I’m almost done with this current book. I just need the time and space to buckle down and get it done. I think most of you might be surprised by this one. There are times when I shake my head, wondering where this all came from. It’s different for me, that’s for sure, but then again, I don’t shy away from tough topics and I never seem to stay within the same sub-genre. Oh well, it’s just the way my mind works I guess.

     I also have two other stories that are in the works. There are times when one kind of struggles along, so I switch to another one until the characters decide to pull their proverbial heads outta their asses. There are times I’d like to just shake ‘em till their teeth rattle.
     Then there is the house remodel…
     Poor, poor Studly-Do-Right. That man has had such the education this week. I’m not sure how it came up (I wasn’t there at the time) but TAT (The Aussie Tart) told poor Studly that he wasn’t my type. HE brought it up at lunch. I think he was fishing as to why. When I told him he wasn’t nearly hairy enough, as in “You have no hair!” He simply replied, “Oh.” Of course me being me, I had to take it a step further. “The best thing about having a hairy guy is there is never a need for dental floss.” The look on that man’s face. I thought he was going to lose it right then and there. It really was priceless. You could just see him running through the visuals, shaking his head. He really does make it too easy sometimes. The education he’s getting… It didn’t seem to spoil his appetite though!

     I don’t really have much more to add today, so I think I’ll cut this off here. I’m also hungry, so I need to go forage for food. Why not start the year off right? Make sure that you take time out for someone else. A smile doesn’t cost much, nor does helping some who may be struggling with something at the grocery store. It doesn’t take much to make someone else’s day. Just do something. It will come back to you.
     Have a grrreat week, y’all.

Sunday, January 24, 2016

I'm Baaaack!

No, he wasn't one of the workmen, but... he'd be welcome!
     So… I’ve been a little busy lately. Okay, that’s a lie… I’ve been so damn busy these last six weeks that I’ve hardly had time to do anything but work, eat and sleep. I did try to let everyone know that I wasn’t dead. I did stop in on FB from time to time to prove that. However, there were a few times I wasn’t sure if I wasn’t so sure I was alive. Damn slave drivers… Anywho, I’m still around and I’m still kicking. Might not be very high, but I’m still at it.
     I’ve been trying my best to finish this book I’ve been working on. A little bit each day, and it is getting closer to being done. Sometimes it’s a good idea to step away from it and let it settle a bit before you can get the creative juices flowing again. Things are moving along nicely, although not as quickly as I wish they would. Oh well, that’s the way it goes sometimes.
     What have I been doing these past few weeks? Sanding, painting, stripping… hardware, you pervs. I know what you immediately thought and no, I’m not taking up stripping… Basically, I’ve been doing just about anything you can think of when you’re redoing a house. I enjoy doing these types of projects, I’ve just never had to do it on such a tight timeline or a whole house at one go.
     Here are some before and after photos. 

     Here’s the thing… TAT (The Aussie Tart) hired a helper. Now, this guy is great, there is no doubt about that. He gets a lot done and a lot of things that I’m no able to do, or just don’t want to do. The problem is… well… he’s a Baptist. –sigh- If that wasn’t bad enough, he’s also a… republican! Oh holly hell, what has she done?
     I have to admit, the man is hot. He ticks a lot of my boxes, just not all of them. The big one is he’s not single. Poor man is married with three kids, and he’s only thirty-two! Tisk-tisk, I did have to mention that there were things that would prevent that. Oh well, I don’t have to feed and clothe them. Also, he’s not nearly hairy enough for me. Actually, he’s practically hairless, so he’s safe.
Studly Do-Right
He's a bit of a goofball
     Then… it came as a revelation to me. He was sent to us to save. Yep, I’m sure of it now. The poor guy is so innocent and unaware of our world that he was delivered to us to educate and show him the way to debauchery and fun. Of course, me being me, I’ve had to bit my tongue… okay, nearly chewed it off would be more accurate, at some of the things he says. He leaves himself so wide open at times, that to a sick and twisted mind like mine, it’s hard not to comment at times. It’s hard, sooo very hard.
     Here’s an example:
     There’s a little work room off the carport of this new house. He’s claimed it, at least for that day, for something he was doing. All the tools are currently in there, which includes my tool box. I was in there looking for something and he says, “Get out of my hole.” Now, what kind of response do you think came to my mind? Hmm, yeah, exactly. I thought I was going to choke to death to keep from saying something. He noticed, and after a few seconds, he shakes his head and walks away, muttering something under his breath. I’m not sure if he came up with something worse than what I was going to say, which I highly doubt it. Poor man.
     It was funny when he found out I was a writer. Of course, he had to ask what I wrote and I tried to be as vague as possible simply saying romance. But TAT snorted and let the cat out of the bag. I’m really trying not to scar this poor guy for life, I swear I’m not, but there are times when people just won’t let things go. He asked, he pushed and let’s just say that it might be awhile before the guy eats bacon again. I’m not sure how it came about, but ‘Going Home’ came up and the scene with the bacon grease. Yeah, he took a little walk after that one. However, he has learned that when I or TAT say, ‘You don’t really want to know’, he leaves it alone. He’s learning.
     Now, I don’t want you to get the impression that he’s some stuck up prude. He’s far from it. He’s actually a lot of fun. Very upbeat, funny, always ready to laugh, and a bundle of energy, which can be a bit irritating at times. He is also very accepting, which means he can be saved… I think. He’s a really good guy who I enjoy being around. Of course, it doesn’t hurt that he’s got a great ass.
     Okay, now speaking of great asses… Wow, some of the tradesmen that have been in and out of the house have been incredible. There was only one, just the one, the plumber, who didn’t meet the mark of ‘Stud’. (Oh, and I’ve been calling the new guy, Studly Do-Right. He doesn’t even bat an eyelash now. Yeah, I’m rubbing off on him.)
     Anyway, there has been a steady stream of eye candy roaming about. The electrician is… OMG… just my type. The pool guy and his helper had bodies that I could watch all day, and did. But it was the tile guy that took my breath away. Holy shit, this guy was… be still my heart…, just hot. On a scale of one through ten, he hit a good solid thirteen. He had it all. Sadly, he’s very straight, married and with kids. Oh well, I could at least look and look I did. Of course, he being on his knees so much of the time only made me drool. I needed a bib.
     We’re coming down the long stretch now. The house is almost done, so I’m going to try and work out a new schedule where I can get more writing done and not be totally incommunicado.
     On a more serious note… A good friend of mine and husband to fellow author, Matt Ortiz, need a little help. He’s recently been diagnosed with brain cancer. He’s had a rough time of it. Please, keep these two wonderful men in your thoughts and prayers. There is a Go Fund page for them to help offset some of the mounting medical bills. Every little bit helps.
     I’d like to say a great big thank you to all who may have helped with the Lost-n-Found’s Christmas list. Those kids deserve all the help they can get. December was a bit of a tight month for me, so I wasn’t able to do as much as I had in previous years, but they seem to have gotten most of their list covered. It’s kind of sad when the kids are asking for socks and underwear for Xmas.
     As always… Please try and do something for someone else. I have seen those Karma Coins at work lately, both good and bad, and I know from the very center of my being, that y’all are doing the right thing. There are so many good things happening and I’m sure that is the reason. Keep up the good work, gang!
     Have a grrreat week, y’all,