Okay, I’m going to warn you now… this is a rant. RANT I say, RANT!
Once again, I saw a post about male vs. female writers in the M/M genre. This time it really made my blood boil. There was one particular comment that really got to me, but I’ll get to that a bit later.
How many times do we have to go through this? It never seems to end, and what I’ve noticed is that there always seems to be the same authors always commenting on it. Really? Yes, really. Over and over and over again. It just makes my eyes cross and steam come out of my ears. I feel like Madeline Kahn from Clue, flames…
I must be one for self-torture, because every time I mention the whole male vs. female writers, I get my ass handed to me. I don’t know how many times I’ve said that there are plenty of good female authors who write M/M. There are just as many bad male authors as there are females I’ve found, so I don’t quite understand why there are some who just have to keep this shit up, because that is what it is… shit.
But then there are some authors who just keep at it, over and over again.
Here is how I see these authors who are always harping on this.
1.) You’re an attention whore and need to be in the spotlight. Poor, poor me.
2.) You’re very insecure in your own work and need constant confirmation and reconfirmation that you’re doing a good job.
3.) You’re a shit stirrer, plain and simple.
IF you are passionate about your writing and you enjoy it, then keep at it. If you have readers who enjoy your work then that is confirmation that you’re doing a good job. This goes for any author, male, female, gay, straight, bi or purple polka-dotted! If you’re doing it for the money, then good luck to you and have fun while doing it. Go on with your bad self.
I used to do a lot more social media than I do now. What changed? I got so tired of being attacked and demonized by other writers and their minions. It got to the point where I had to hire an attorney. Oh, that was right after I was almost arrested for sexual assault, which never happened. A rumor started by… guess who? Yep, a female author. So yes, I’ve backed way off out of self-preservation. I cannot tell you how many times I’ve been raked over the coals by female authors.
Let me say once again: I have never said that female authors can’t write gay characters. What I have said is that there are plenty of good writers out there, male and female and there are equally as many bad ones. Period. If you’re going to write gay characters, it would be nice if you actually did the research and got it right if you want ME to read it that is.
Now then, onto what really pissed me off…
“Until women writers burst onto the scene a few years ago gay romance was very few and far between to find.”
WTF? Really? Want to tell that to some very well-known authors?
How about E.M. Forster? He wrote Maurice. Oh, by the way, that was published in 1913! Was it classified as romance? No, but then it was aimed at a general audience.
How about Felice Picano? Damn, what a fine writer.
Gordon Merrick: The Lord Won’t Mind Oh, a best seller on the New York Times list for weeks on end!
Armistead Maupin, who happens to be one of my all-time favorites.
Anne Rice, under several non de plumes. Oh look a female author!
Are we to forget Oscar Wilde? I certainly hope not!
Okay, granted there wasn’t the plethora of titles available, but it doesn’t mean they weren’t there and available. It’s just that most people had to purposefully look for them, and most of them weren’t classified as romance. So yes, there were gay books that had men as main characters and often times there were relationships between them and yes, there was romance.
NOTE: Most men, straight, gay, bi or in between, will not go looking in the romance aisle. It’s a guy thing I guess. But it doesn’t mean they aren’t reading!
Hell, the last book I published I wouldn’t classify as a romance. There was no romance the hint of romance or even SEX, until the last ninety-percent of the book! It was about how two gay men dealt with loss and PTSD. How they supported each other on a daily basis.
I think I’m luckier than most because I do have a good gay male following, which is not the case for most authors I’ve found out recently. It isn’t like I haven’t worked for them either. I’ve busted my ass to get other gay men to read my work. Trust me, it isn’t an easy task.
So, when I see a female author whining about the whole female vs. male authors, I normally roll my eyes and move on and don’t get involved. However, this time I took exception with the comment that there weren’t gay male books available and it was female authors who made the whole genre what it is today. WRONG!
Okay, this is really going to get me into trouble…
Girl, put on your big girl panties and get over it. Write what YOU want to write. If you have sales; fantastic. If you have a best seller; even better. If it bombs, then you need to listen to the READERS and figure out why.
If you write a chick with dick book, you can count on me not reading it. If you write a MPREG book, I’m not going to pick it up. Oh, and by the way, I don’t JUST read M/M either. I don’t care if the characters are NOT gay. It is nice to find a good M/M book, but I’m not going to just read any ol’ thing either.
YOU do not have permission to tell my how to feel. That street goes both ways. If you feel persecuted, then that is on you. That doesn’t mean I have to listen to it either. I don’t really care what is between your legs. You either have skills or you don’t. Full stop. (Damn, those Aussie’s rubbed off on me.)
The one thing I’ve learned since I started this gig was you need to have a very thick skin. If you let the haters get to you, then you need to bail out now. If you get a bad review, you need to look at it for what it is and take away from it what you need to make yourself better. Water. Duck. Back. Move on.
I have never said it before, but I am going to now…
IF I see a post from anywhere, where an author is belly aching over the whole female vs. male author thing, I’m going to unfriend, unfollow or whatever the case maybe. I’ve been doing it quietly but now I’m putting it out there. If you bash another author, the same thing. I’m not going to listen to such crap.
Let me wrap this up…
To all authors out there; write what you want. Read what you want. Do what you want. Just do not expect to receive respect when you cry about how unfair things are. No one ever said life was easy or fair. And you want to be treated equal, no matter your gender, then stop with all the boohooing and get on with making your craft the best it can be. Do not let anyone tell you that you can’t because of your gender. That especially goes for yourself!
You wanna run with the big dogs? Then you damn well better grow up and start running. You’ll never be able to stay with the pack if you’re sitting in a puddle of your own tears.
Just another side note: I have recently told several female authors how much I enjoyed their work!
Taking escalator down from soapbox.